Money is not only worry

Friday, Jan. 1, 2010

Money worries are an obvious consequence of being laid off, but for those for whom working is a core part of their identity, losing a job can be a devastating loss of structure and identity, according to Dr. Larry Froman, a professor of psychology at Towson University who does research and consulting on employment issues.

"When you talk loss, the loss may not be just the paycheck. If you ask people, ‘If you didn't have to work, if you were independently wealthy, would you still work?' most people say yes. We want to feel valued and productive and when the jobs are not there that's a key thing missing in our lives. It's hard to fill it. We have other things going on in our lives but clearly a job, a career has always been a major anchor for how we view ourselves as productive members of society," Froman said.

"The sense of loss can really be a key problem. You talk to even retirees, ask them, ‘What do you miss most about not working?' Many will say: relationships, the people I work with, having a place to hang my hat each day. People will say the structure. Another piece to this story is identity. If you're a very job- or career-oriented person, losing that job would affect your sense of identity ... and that can be challenging," he said.

Distress at losing a job is natural, but for some it can go further than that.

The shock of unemployment can plunge some into clinical depression, trapped behind a "psychological wall," Froman said, and "people are blinded by their own despair and cannot see and respond to opportunities that might be out there to find another job." This persistent mental paralysis is distinct from feelings of sadness and anxiety that fade when the sufferer's circumstances improve.

To combat despair, a clinically depressed person needs to counter his own pessimistic way of thinking by emphasizing the positive even when realities are bleak, Froman said.

"Self doubt, loss of confidence, possibly even this deeper issue of loss of self-esteem. People begin to really feel bad about themselves. They can say on one level, ‘It's not my fault, it's out of my control,' but still, like I said, people personalize and for some people it can get very personal and they start to doubt themselves," Froman said.

"When you couple all these emotions, and if all those emotions get linked to a loss of confidence, self-doubt, self-blame, then you're talking about something very serious where people can sink into a very dark hole, trapped and immobilized by a sense of depression and despair," he said. "That's where it's really critical to garner strength from within, support from family and other areas and find the strength to not let that spiral get worse. The concern for some people is this downward negative spiral can intensify."

To start climbing out of the hole, Froman suggests using his "SMARTER" goal-setting model. Goals should be: specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and timely, he said; the person must then evaluate and re-evaluate his goals to make sure they are still useful.

By setting practical and concrete goals, the sufferer can regain a sense of control over his own life, Froman said.

Erica Mitrano